The Ultimate SQL Server

• Fibre Channel Connection with maximum amount of cache available. SCSI is so passé.
  
  
• Direct Attach, SAN. I don’t care how the servers connect to storage, as long as I can get to my data faster than Bill Gates earns a dollar.
  
  
• 15,000 RPM disk drives. I don’t live in California, so I don’t care if these drives drink electricity.
  
  
• A cool one terabyte disk space. Anything less wouldn’t have enough bragging rights. Besides, its easier to glibly say, “My server has one terabyte” instead of “my server has one hundred-eight gigabytes.” (Fewer words to get out.)

Networking

• Two Gigabit Networking Cards, each connected directly to its own exclusive Gigabit switch ports. I would need two, just in case one decided to take a break.

Other

• NEC 18” LCD Screen. My baby blues deserve the best.
  
  
• 16x/10x/40x CD-RW Drive. I want to be able to burn mix CDs when I'm performing routine backups.

Software

• Windows 2000 Datacenter Server. Everything else is a wimp. The hard part, as I found out, is finding out how much this software costs. I searched the Internet in vain looking for how many pennies that my company will have to spend for an unlimited use license for eight CPUs. I guess the cost is so high, that they don’t want to put it on a web page and scare you away. All the references I found to its cost said to e-mail or call for more information. [Note: one visitor to my website pointed out that one vendor's price for Windows 2000 Datacenter Server can be found here.]
  
  
• SQL Server 2000 Enterprise Edition. What else is there? And it can be yours for only $20,000 per CPU, or $160,000.

As I was pondering this list, I felt something was missing. An empty feeling penetrated by soul, my entire being. It was like I was alone in the universe. Then it hit me. I now knew what was missing. A 4-way cluster. Yea, that’s it. A 4-way cluster.

With a 4-way cluster, I could run SQL Server on three of the servers, leaving the fourth one for failover purposes. In fact, I would want four identical servers, as described above. The only difference would be that I would want to share my one terabyte of disk storage among all four servers. And then again, maybe I really need four terabytes of storage, you know, just in case.

Getting a server like I have described above would be like receiving my first two-wheeler for Christmas, maybe even better. I don’t have my hopes up too high that I will get one soon, but you never know. Ed McMahan could knock on my door.