SQL Server Performance


Discussion in 'The Lighter Side of Being a DBA' started by smy, Nov 24, 2006.

  1. smy New Member

    NGIF - No God, Its Friday... [<img src='/community/emoticons/emotion-6.gif' alt=':(' />]<br /><br />Here's a joke to share.<br /><br />There's a funny user who called..<br /><i>Ring...Ring....</i><br />tech: hello? how can I help you? <br />user: well, I would like to upgrade my RAM.<br />tech: sure, but before that, can you tell me what's your current RAM's MBtyes?<br />user: ok..how can I check on that?<br />tech: from your desktop, right click My Computer.<br />user: oh..my desktop...wait...I am not at my desk right now.<br /><font color="blue">&lt;&lt;a few moment of silence......&gt;&gt;</font id="blue"><br />user: alright, I am at my desk now. So what should I do?<br />tech: on your desktop, right click My Computer.<br />user: <font color="purple">**confused**</font id="purple"> what?<br />tech: on your desktop, right click My Computer.<br /><font color="blue">&lt;&lt;a few moment of silence again......&gt;&gt;</font id="blue"><br />user: oh...I am sorry, but I can't remember when you had come over to my house and place your computer to my desk top...by the way, I would like to upgrade my computer..why do you want me to check on your computer instead?<br />tech: <font color="purple">**fainted**</font id="purple">
  2. FrankKalis Moderator

    [<img src='/community/emoticons/emotion-5.gif' alt=';)' />]<br /><br />--<br />Frank Kalis<br />Moderator<br />Microsoft SQL Server MVP<br />Webmaster:<a target="_blank" href=http://www.insidesql.de>http://www.insidesql.de</a>
  3. Madhivanan Moderator

    <br />Customer : My system hangs<br />System Engineer : Restart the system<br />Customer : (After swithed off and on the monitor) I did but still same problem<br /><br />[<img src='/community/emoticons/emotion-2.gif' alt=':D' />]<br /><br />Madhivanan<br /><br />Failing to plan is Planning to fail
  4. ghemant Moderator

    LOL <img src='/community/emoticons/emotion-5.gif' alt=';-)' />)<br /><br />Hemantgiri S. Goswami<br />"Humans don't have Caliber to PASS TIME , Time it self Pass or Fail Humans" - by Hemantgiri S. Goswami<br />------------------------<br /<a target="_blank" href=http://hemantgirisgoswami.blogspot.com>http://hemantgirisgoswami.blogspot.com</a>

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