I know some are old ones but always worth us a laugh 1. Tom: I have'nt slept all night in the train. Friend: why? Tom: Got upper berth. Friend: why did'nt you exchnged the birth? Tom: there was nobody to exchnge in the lower berth... 2. A Teacher lecturing on population - In world after Every 10 second a woman gives birth to a kid. A Tom stands up- we must find & stop her!. 3. Tom-why are all these people running? Man- This is a race, the winner will get the cup. Tom-If only the winner will get the cup, why are others running? 4. Teacher: "I killed a person" convert this sentence into future tense. Tom: The future tense is "you will go to jail". 5. Tom gets ready ,wears tie, coat ,goes out, climbs tree, sits on the branch regularly. A man asks why he does this. Tom:"I've been promoted as branch manager." 6. Tom was filling up application form for a job. He was not sure as to what to be filled in column "Salary Expected". After much thought he wrote : Yes! 7. Once Tom asked a plumber to come to his college. you know Why? Because he wanted to check where the question paper is leaking... 8. Tom told his servant: Go and water the plants. Servant: It"s already raining. Tom: So what? take an umbrella and go. 9. Tom found the answer to the most difficult question ever - What came first, Chicken or egg? what ever you order first will come first. 10. Tom wins 20 million $ from 20 $ lottery ticket. Dealer gave 11 million $ after deducting tax. Angry Tom: "Give me 20 crore or else return my 20 $ back.! 11. Postman:- I had to come 5 miles to deliver you this packet Tom:- why did you come so far. Instead you could have posted it.... 12. Tom proposed to a Girl......Girl said 'I'm 1 year older to you'........... Tom said 'no problem , I'll marry you NEXT YEAR. 13. Tom at an Art Gallery: I suppose this horrible looking thing is what you call modern art ? Art dealer: I beg your pardon sir, that's a mirror! 14. Tom was writing something very slowly. Friend asked:" Why are you writing so slowly? Tom: "I'm writing to my 6 yr old son, he can't read very fast. Hemantgiri S. Goswami ghemant@gmail.com "Humans don't have Caliber to PASS TIME , Time it self Pass or Fail Humans" - by Hemantgiri S. Goswami
<i>13.<br />Tom at an Art Gallery: I suppose this horrible looking thing is<br />what you call modern art ?<br />Art dealer: I beg your pardon sir, that's a mirror!</i><br />A classy one.. LOL [<img src='/community/emoticons/emotion-1.gif' alt='' />].<br /><br /><hr noshade size="1"><b>Satya SKJ</b><br />Contributing Editor & Forums Moderator<br /<a target="_blank" href=http://www.SQL-Server-Performance.Com>http://www.SQL-Server-Performance.Com</a><br /><center><font color="teal"><font size="1">This posting is provided “AS IS†with no rights for the sake of <i>knowledge sharing.</i></font id="size1"></font id="teal"></center>
14<br />[<img src='/community/emoticons/emotion-2.gif' alt='' />]<br /><br />Madhivanan<br /><br />Failing to plan is Planning to fail
