Q - What is the Difference Between Mother & Wife ? A - One Woman Brings U into this world crying... & the other ensures U Continue to do so. Wife : Do you want dinner? Husband : Sure, what are my choices? Wife : Yes and no. They say that when a man holds a woman's hand before marriage, it is love; after marriage it is self-defense It is difficult to understand GOD. He makes such beautiful things as women..and then he turns them into Wives !?!!!?! What is the difference between a woman and a magnet? Magnets have a positive side! Girl: When we get married, I want to share all your worries, troubles and lighten your burden. Boy: It's very kind of you, darling, But I don't have any worries or troubles. Girl: Well that is because we aren't married yet. Son: Mom, when I was on the bus with Dad this morning, he told me to give up my seat to a lady. Mom: Well, you have done the right thing. Son: But mum, I was sitting on daddy's lap. Its funny when people discuss over "love marriage" and "arranged marriage" It is like asking a person if he would like to "hang himself" or "shoot himself". What is a girl friend? Addition of problems, subtraction of money, multiplication of enemies & division of friends. Guide: "I welcome you all to Niagara Falls . These are the world's largest waterfalls and the sound intensity of the waterfall is so high, even 20 supersonic planes passing! by can't be heard. Now may I request the ladies to keep quite so that we can hear the Niagara Falls?" Thanks, Ram "It is easy to write code for a spec and walk in water, provided, both are freezed..."