Asked to write a composition entitled, "What I'm thankful for on Thanksgiving," a student wrote, "I am thankful that I'm not a turkey." A busload of politicians were driving down a country road, when suddenly the bus ran off the road and crashed into an old farmer's barn. The old farmer got off his tractor and went to investigate. Soon he dug a hole and buried the politicians. A few days later, the local sheriff came out, saw the crashed bus and asked the old farmer where all the politicians had gone. The old farmer told him he had buried them. The sheriff asked the old farmer, ''Lordy, were they ALL dead?'' The old farmer said, ''Well, some of them said they weren't, but you know how them crooked politicians lie.'' The HMO account manager noticed that nearly every bill from one pediatrician's office included the line item "behavior modification reinforcers." Fearing that the doctor was engaging in some unapproved, experimental psychological treatment, she called the pediatrician's office to inquire, "What on earth are behavior modification reinforcers?" "Lollipops," was the reply. There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer. When asked to define "great" he said, "I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!" He now works for Microsoft, writing error messages.